Brandi Whyne Chapter 4 Read online

  Once I was over the initial shock of Mr. Hedgehog’s size and shape I foresaw many pleasant possibilities.

  “That’s terrific. Can you ease him inside me without going too fast? Can you stop when I tell you to stop? Do you have that much control?”

  He nodded. “I’ll try. But I don’t think he’ll stay buried long. I get excited and start shaking really quickly and then he goes to sleep. I get excited when I clean Mr. Hedgehog in the shower just about every day.” He blushed. “I got excited just before you showed up.”

  Premature ejaculation? That could very well be a blessing in this case!

  “Don’t worry. I don’t think I’ll last that long myself. Let’s try it.”

  Millimeter by millimeter Mr. Hedgehog wound his way past my labia and into my moist vagina. Several times I had to ask John Thomas to halt his eager friend so I could breathe and relax, but little by little a good portion of his cock took up residence inside my tight cunt. Not daring to cause further internal damage to my female anatomy, I advised my partner to remain still and allow me to move my hips.

  I leisurely corkscrewed my pussy about the thick, bumpy cock while John Thomas suckled my tits and rubbed my clit with a finger. Within twenty seconds my womanly muscles began to spasm and clench about his mighty member. I tossed back my head and shrieked as I experienced stellar explosions and tremors the likes of which had not been witnessed since the first Big Bang.

  “Should we stop? Did I hurt you?”

  I kissed the worried expression from his face. “Oh, not at all. It felt good. How do you feel?”

  He giggled. “Nice. Can you do that again? Mr. Hedgehog isn’t shaking quite yet.”

  I smiled and began another torturously slow figure eight motion with my hips. My second orgasm overwhelmed me quicker than the first, leaving me hoarse and breathless.

  “That was fun,” John Thomas said. “Your insides tickled me. Can I bounce you up and down like Willie and Robin did at the last orgy?”

  I blinked the falling stars from my eyes. “You were at the last orgy?”

  “Uh-huh. I watched it on a vid screen from my room. I usually do that. I don’t want to scare anyone. Can I bounce you, please?”

  I mutely nodded my consent, my scrambled brain cells not realizing what I’d agreed to before it was too late. “Um, wait a moment, I don’t think you’d better…”

  His first thrust had my head hitting the cabin’s ceiling. I grasped for his shoulders to brace myself and fell prone across his chest. The second thrust had me gasping for air.

  But the third time was a charm. With a shout that reverberated throughout the Parsnip, John Thomas orgasmed, filling me with so much cum I thought I’d drown. The vibrating, barb-covered cock worked better than any dildo Robin could sell on the black market. My screams soon joined my partners as we climaxed together for what seemed an eternity.

  Completely drained, I collapsed into John Thomas’s well-built arms. We snored away our well-deserved exhaustion until a knock came at the door.

  “Keep it down in there,” Dr. Kwak said through the intercom. “Or else go to Zelda’s quarters near the engine room. We can’t hear the screaming from the lower decks.”

  “You want to go to Zelda’s?” John Thomas’s eager smile and wide eyes brought tears of joy to my already moist eyes.

  “Next week. How about next week?” I unsuccessfully attempted to force my V-shaped legs together. “I may need some physical therapy before then.”

  * * * *

  As expected, the next day Robin acted none too happy that I had remained the rest of the evening shift in John Thomas’s bed. Yes, I was still angry with Robin for his teasing. But truth be told, I had stayed the night because I felt unable to walk for several hours after my encounter with Mr. Hedgehog.

  My new task was now clear. Somehow I had to prepare poor Peri for the overpowering experience of lovemaking with a half human-half Hardonian lover. Would she be up to handling the challenge? Would she even want to? And—gulp! Would I be stuck pleasuring John Thomas during the next ship-wide orgy? I shuddered at the thought. We’d draw a gawking crowd for sure.

  Those worries soon faded as we arrived at Old Smokey, Robin Manhood’s secret hideout. Old Smokey was aptly named. The uncharted, rocky planet circling the neutron star teamed with simmering volcanoes, steaming vents and caustic lava flows. How on earth could a life-sustaining environment for humanoids be constructed on such a hellish world?

  A broadly smiling John Thomas, sharper than ever at the navigation console, skillfully maneuvered the Pulsating Purple Parsnip through a series of long caves nestled within a tall range of mountains located in the planet’s southern hemisphere. Oddly enough, deep within the planet there seemed to be no lava, no steaming vents and no volcanic activity whatsoever.

  “It doesn’t make any sense,” I said, watching the bridge viewscreen closely. “This planet seems hollow, yet its surface is covered with seismic activity.”

  “It’s different all right.” Robin waggled an eyebrow and nodded toward the navi-puter. “It emits its own docking signal, too.”

  “That’s impossible.” I took a seat beside my fellow pilot and stared at the transmission—regular, modulated, precise. Finally I caught on.

  “I see. Old Smokey isn’t a natural space body. It’s a space station.”

  “So she isn’t just another pretty face with a great tits and an ass to die for?” Willie winked at me then opened a communications channel. “Parsnip to Old Smokey. Turn on the landing lights. We’re coming home.”

  In the distance a docking platform was suddenly and brilliantly illuminated. The Parsnip slowed to a crawl then gently landed between the racing strips of green lights. Within moments the engines cut off and the hatch was lowered. Space weary space pirates scrambled down the gangplank to the open arms of their friends and loved ones.

  Their joyful reunions brought tears to my eyes. I sniffed loudly as I made my way toward what appeared to be a dome covering the underground hideout.

  “What’s the matter? Isn’t it all you expected it to be?” Robin asked.

  “It is—and more. I’m just a little jealous that my shipmates all have family members to welcome them home. I’m… I’m an orphan.”

  Robin wrapped a long arm around my shoulders and squeezed tight. “No more. You’re now a part of our big, happy family, the Robin Manhood gang. Soon you’ll have lots of people to rush out and greet you whenever you return from a space voyage.”

  I smiled my thanks. In spite of the hardships and difficulties I’d encountered along the way, it felt wonderful to finally have someplace to call home.

  Towering transparent doors swooshed open as we reached the domed complex. My heart beat faster at the dazzling lights and colors of what could only be described as a small city built inside a manufactured planet. How had Robin come to possess such a magnificent base of operations?

  “I know what you’re thinking.” Robin ushered me inside and guided me toward a massive, rectangular building located in the center of the complex. “You’re thinking, ‘How did that asshole Robin ever obtain such a fantastic hideout?’ Don’t deny it—it’s what I’d wonder if I’d met me in a space pirate bar and then visited this place.”

  I bit my lip and shrugged. “Uh, yes, that’s exactly what I was thinking. Did you steal it from somebody? Stumble over it by accident?”

  “Better that that. I won it in a game of Frizbyn.”

  “You played a card game and won an entire planet?”

  His proud grin spread from ear to ear. “Yes. And I won something even great than this hideout from old King Ricky—I single-handedly control all of the black marketing adult toy distribution in this sector as well by regal decree.”

  “King Ricardo?” The regent wasn’t exactly known for his benevolence. In fact, he was better known for his cruelty and impatience. I couldn’t imagine his Imperial Majesty, King Ricardo the Party Pooper, the ruler of the known galaxy freely gambling away such a co
stly space station away. There had to be a catch.

  “You still don’t believe me? Here, let me show you.”

  The sign above the doorway simply read ‘Operations’. So, this was the headquarters of all of Robin’s activities, the hive brain, the control center, the place where everything came together. Here competent soldiers coordinated and acted with ruthless efficiency and precision. I prepared myself to be impressed.

  It was a wasted effort.

  “Hello, Boss Man,” called out a raspy voice with a familiar accent. “We’re on top of things here as usual.”

  The operations room was a complete and utter disaster. Printed computer read-outs littered the consoles and floor. Myriads of sticky, yellow paper squares decorated almost every conceivable facade not covered by printouts. Mugs of moldy liquids and crumbling, half-eaten pastries took up residence on just about every flat surface.

  A rustling sound amid the squalor indicated where the greetings had originated. The voice belonged to a female Cyclops that I could only surmise was Bigguns’ mate.

  “Bugsy! It’s good to see you again, my dear.” Robin slapped her on what could only loosely be termed a shoulder. The shuffling one-eyed alien stood every bit as hunchbacked as her spouse.

  “Brandi, this is Buggins, affectionately known as ‘Bugsy’, our chief paper pusher. Bugsy, here’s the newest member of the crew, Brandi Whyne. You’ll see that she gets all her paperwork in order and gets signed up for the HMO, the 401K plan and for SPOARC.”

  “Spork?” I scratched my head. “What is that?”

  Bugsy spit a stream of chuma leaf juice into a conveniently located cup she absentmindedly had picked up from a console. “SPOARC stands for ‘Space Pirates’ Old Age Retirement Center’. The Robin Manhood Company, LLC, is a proud sponsor of many agencies designed to help ease the transition from ruthless space pirate to doddering, drunken, show tune singing fool in the later years of life.”

  “How commendable,” I replied.

  I sighed and scanned the cluttered room once more. Whatever Bugsy did around here, Robin was pleased with the results. He smiled and nodded enthusiastically while checking numbers on a printout he’d picked up off the floor.

  “Good news, Bugsy. I’m glad to see our shares in the Hardonian concrete condom market are doing well. Keep me informed the minute you hear from our middleman on Sirius Four, will you?”

  “You gotta it, Boss Man.”

  Robin grabbed my elbow and led me from the control room. “You know, if you showed any signs of being a business type of humanoid, I’d put you in Operations working under Bugsy. She could teach you a lot.”

  “I dare say she could.”

  I did my best not to roll my eyes at the thought. All I figured was that Bugsy could show me how to chew and spit chuma leaf juice and post sticky, yellow notes throughout the room. Even my disgustingly lax Aunt Cruilla seemed better organized.

  “Where are we going now?” I asked as Robin whisked me out of Operations. We were heading toward a tall block of buildings that reminded me of housing units on my former home world of Proxima. Already welcome home celebrations had begun, as the sounds of music and laughter rained down from open windows into the square below.

  “To my little cubbyhole,” Robin replied nonchalantly. “We’re kind of short on private quarters here as we were on the ship. But if you’d rather sleep at John Thomas’s place, I can show you where he lives.”

  “No!” I swallowed hard and tried to compose myself. My words sounded a bit too harsh. “No, thank you. I’m sorry I didn’t return to our quarters on the Parsnip after my ‘counseling session’ with John Thomas. I simply lost track of time.”

  “I could see how that could have happened. You fried your brain after rough riding ‘Mr. Hedgehog’. The limp is still noticeable.”

  I quirked an eyebrow and grinned. “Jealous, eh?”

  “Jealous? Me?” A narrow glass elevator descended to meet us. We stepped inside and Robin hit a button for the thirteenth floor. “Never. There’s not a jealous bone in my entire body.”

  “That’s good. After all, you told me I had to obey superior officer’s orders at all times. John Thomas is my superior officer on the navigation console, correct?”

  Robin frowned. “He is.”

  “And he requested my help. If I refused, I’d have to be disciplined again. And since I’m acting disciplinarian until Zelda returns it would be a very difficult task to discipline myself.”

  “As Captain I could have stepped in.” The little boy lost look flashed briefly in his dark eyes then faded. “You’re right about one thing, though. Obeying orders is important aboard ship. Here on Old Smokey we’re much more relaxed in following rules.”

  “Really?” I laughed. “So we can start orgies whenever we like instead of scheduling them in advance?”

  Robin’s jaw dropped open in pretend shock. The elevator door did likewise, revealing an entire penthouse suite on the top floor of the housing unit.

  “Some ‘cubbyhole’ this is!” I clapped my hands. “It’s huge!”

  I raced into the plush bachelor’s pad. No shades of purple, lavender or mauve were to be found here. Long sheer curtains in forest green, rich golds and deep browns accented throw pillows in similar hues. Tall lamps with posts made of rough-hewn wood, gave one the feeling of prancing through a forest.

  “Yes, it’s bigger than I remember. I get so accustomed to living in cramped quarters in space that I forget I actually have room to spread out here.” He flopped down into a conversation pit of pillows and closed his eyes. “It’s good to be home.”

  I jumped into the pit next to him. “Yes, it is. Since this is my home now, too.”

  He cracked open an eye and observed me closely. “You don’t want to redecorate, do you?”

  I shook my head. “No, it’s fine the way it is—for now.” I started to giggle at the look of horror on his face. “I’m kidding. I wouldn’t touch a tree or a thing, that is.”

  “You see the forest, don’t you?” Sitting up, he pulled me toward him. “I don’t think anyone I’ve brought to my sanctuary ever has understood my intent. I designed this place to look like my namesake’s home on Old Terra. This is my ‘Sherwood Forest’.”

  “And a very lovely forest it is.” I kissed him tenderly on the lips. “All you need are some flying creatures and woodland mammals.”

  “I had a holo-parrot at one time, but it drove me up the wall. It crumbled crackers all over the place and squawked at odd hours of the night. I’ve thought of getting some holo-bunnies, but I’m not sure what I’d do with the extras if they started to multiply.”

  I kissed him again. “You could give them away as free gifts with the purchase of an adult toy.”

  “Hmm… That’s not such a bad idea.” He returned my kisses with those of his own, tender, passionate, and filled with longing. I sensed he was about to open up and admit that he felt the same way I did—that he had at last come to realize that the goddess had chosen us to be soul mates.

  “I couldn’t sleep very well without you in my arms,” he whispered. “Don’t stay away at night again. Please?”

  It wasn’t quite what I wanted to hear, but it was a start.

  “I won’t. I promise.”

  Our kissing intensified. We shed our clothes and soon were locked in a bliss-filled embrace. I moaned and arched as his cock slide inside me, filling me, completing me, bringing me to the edge of ecstasy and back again and again.

  No matter where my adventures in the galaxy carried me, I knew there would never be another man in my life like Robin Manhood.

  * * * *

  After a minimum period of adjustment, I felt comfortable with my new life under Old Smokey. Besides my fellow Parsnip crewmembers, the citizens included the resident staff that ran such intricate workings as life support, heat, and food manufacturing along with spaceship repairs and running warehousing facilities. I was surprised to learn that many of my shipmates had families—husbands, wi
ves, or other spousal units—and some even had offspring. Robin accepted them all and gave them jobs, homes and necessities without expecting much of anything in return.

  Curiously, Robin’s magnanimous nature had not become the stuff of legend. I began to wonder how much of the lusty, rough-and-tumble myths of Robin Manhood were based on reality and how many were blatantly manufactured for publicity purposes. I soon found out. For none other than Peri Poundstone, John Thomas’s one true love, headed the office of “public relations”.

  “Peri?” I entered the dimly lit office on the second floor of the Operations center where Bugsy had informed me the publicist kept shop. “Are you in?”

  “Yes, I’m somewhere in here,” came a feeble cry. “The fax started spitting out a bunch of free offers for trips for four to the Disney-Planet. I got caught in the deluge.”

  I rushed over to a huge pile of brightly colored printed press releases and began digging. Soon I spotted a hand, then an arm and at last a head. I blinked in disbelief.

  Peri Poundstone wasn’t quite what I pictured in a successful public relations expert. She wasn’t quite what I expected for John Thomas’s crush, either. Sure, he wasn’t the sharpest axe in an axe-murderer’s collection, but he did have the hots for me. I wasn’t half bad looking, if I said so myself.

  Peri seemed to suffer from terminal drabness. Her frizzy, mouse-brown hair hung limply to her bony shoulders. Her doughy complexion could stand a bit of cosmetics to liven it up. I pulled her to her feet then cringed. Her beige, sackcloth style dress hung off her like… well, like a sack.

  No jewelry, no trim, no pizzazz whatsoever, accented her outfit. She sported a pair of round, black antique spectacles that made her eyes look like a flying predator of Old Terra. Hadn’t she heard of Lasik surgery? The woman needed a complete makeover. Should I be the one to do it?